Posted on November 2, 2011
For those unfortunate few born north of the Mason-Dixon, I would like to provide a brief explanation of the expression, “Bless your heart.” Used most often by southern women, the comment is attached as a suffix to a response given to another party in casual conversation.
Female to female example:
Southern friend: “Do I look fat in these jeans?”
Southern friend response: “No, honey, they look great. Your last babies were only nine months apart, bless your heart.”
Translation: “Of course you’ll keep those thunder thighs if you don’t stop popping out kids every nine months. Can’t you keep your legs crossed, bitch?”
Male airline passenger: “Could I have another vodka/cranberry, with a twist this time?”
Female flight attendant: “Sure, darlin’, did I miss the twist on the last two? You must be thirsty, bless your heart.”
Translation: “You ring that bell one more time and I will have the pilot parachute you out over the next major city. What do you think this is, your neighborhood watering hole?”
So you get the idea. Use it and enjoy. But I’d start with yankees first. The wiser part of the country is on to it.
